Saturday, May 11, 2013


I feel somewhat bad that I haven't taken time to write in a few months.  I'm disappointed that I haven't done a better job of following through with my goal of blogging.  The reality is that I haven't had much time or much heart for anything but getting through life day by day. 

It has been a long school year for our family.  Sometimes we get to this point in the year and I feel like we just started...I can't believe it is almost time to move on.  Not this year.  I look at pictures from a few months ago and I can hardly remember what happened.  I feel as if we have struggled our way through one day at a time.  I'm exhausted.  Fully spent.

I've always been a hard worker.  I've always been efficient.  I've had many people express their amazement at how I can "make things happen" and "get things done".   But even I am amazed at what I managed to do this school year--Be the wife of a medical resident, mother four children, PTA President, 20 piano students, substitute teach 2-3 days a week, care for our home, help friends, coach a Science Olympiad team, play for the school choir, and so much more.  I realize that I've had a lot of sustaining help from angels--heavenly and earthly--this year.  I really couldn't have done it alone.  I couldn't have done it at all.

I also realize there are a lot of things I haven't done.  There are opportunities and experiences I have missed because I have been so busy.  (Or so exhausted from all my work that I had no desire left to do much of anything.)  I have done a horrible job on my Church service which has left me carrying a huge load of guilt and frustration.  I haven't read to my kids at night.  I haven't practiced instruments with them.  My house is messy.  I forgot to color the milk green on St. Patrick's Day.

I'm filled with both pride over what I have accomplished and grief for opportunities lost.  BUT, the reality is that I know I was supposed to carry this heavy load.  It was my burden for this time.

It was the right thing for me to be the PTA President.  I know that I have been blessed to help support our family by teaching piano lessons for the past 12 years.  There are experiences my own children could not have had if I hadn't sacrificed my time with them to teach others.  I also know that it was very important for me to substitute at the elementary school.  I have needed that experience to help me answer some personal questions, make valuable friends, and gain much needed insight.

And in just the same way I knew I was supposed to pick all these things up, I know it is now time to set them down.  I feel strongly inspired to pull in and reset. I need to re-center my life on my home and my children.  There are people and activities I will miss about my crazy life, but I have an overwhelming sense of peace when I think about simplifying and slowing down.  The burdens are no longer mine to carry.


  1. Becky, Don't ever forget how incredible you are! You continually amaze me and I'm always learning from you!

  2. Love this. I'm so happy for you to be excited about changing directions a little. I'm sure you will still be just as efficient and energetic... it will be fun to see where it is all poured this time.

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  4. What a great family picture. I can't believe how old the kids are now!